In many Nigerian households, when a couple faces difficulty conceiving, the woman is often the first—and sometimes only—one blamed. People begin to whisper. Prayers intensify. Advice, whether asked for or not, pours in. Society places the burden of infertility squarely on women’s shoulders.
But this belief is outdated and harmful. Infertility is not solely a woman’s issue. In fact, holding onto this idea continues to damage women, men, and families alike. It also undermines progress in reproductive health awareness.
The Ignored Truth About Infertility
Globally, infertility affects both men and women almost equally. Medical research shows that male factor infertility plays a role in 30 to 50 percent of all infertility cases. This means men are just as likely as women to have reproductive challenges.
However, in many Nigerian homes, this possibility is often ignored. Women undergo numerous tests, traditional treatments, and invasive medical procedures. Meanwhile, their male partners may not even be asked to take a basic semen analysis. This lack of balanced investigation is not just unjust—it’s irresponsible from a healthcare standpoint.
Blame Culture Causes Real Harm
Culturally, fertility is seen as a woman’s responsibility. When pregnancy doesn’t happen, women are often blamed, criticized, or even rejected. Some are mistreated by in-laws. Others watch as their husbands take second or third wives, leaving them emotionally shattered.
Men, too, suffer—but silently. The fear of being seen as “the problem” can be deeply humiliating. Many avoid medical help altogether due to stigma. This silence only delays diagnosis and treatment that could lead to solutions.
Toward a Shared Responsibility
It’s time to move away from blame and toward partnership. Fertility should be seen as a joint responsibility between couples. Here’s what needs to happen:
−Both partners should get tested early in the process.
−Open conversations about infertility must be encouraged.
−Men should be included in fertility education and support programs.
−Cultural and religious beliefs that target women unfairly should be challenged.
Infertility is a medical condition—not a curse or punishment. No one should suffer in silence, and no one should face judgment for something beyond their control.
Creating Safe Spaces for Support
As the world marks Fertility Awareness Month this June, now is the time to embrace understanding and compassion. One way to do this is by tuning into the Fertility Conversations Podcast, hosted by Ola Taiwo, a Fertility Health Coach.
This podcast offers a safe space for open discussion about infertility. It features fertility specialists and real-life stories from men and women across the world. Topics include male infertility, IVF, surrogacy, adoption, and emotional recovery. The goal is to educate, inspire, and build a supportive community for anyone facing fertility challenges.
Let’s End the Blame and Start the Healing
This year, let’s stop asking, “What’s wrong with her?” and start asking, “How can we support them?” Let’s replace shame with science, silence with support, and blame with compassion.
Because when we remove the blame, we create space for healing—and hope.
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